I've tried to keep The Boy's peanut allergy from being a topic for a couple reasons; it's sparks a lot of anger from non-allergic people, and it's just not that funny. However, over the past few weeks, Mr. Peanut has been popping up in conversations alot, and although a lovable, recognizable piece of Americana ; I find him to be a pesky little legume that hides evil inside him. This all started when The Neighbor/Friend and I went to get tattoos. We were driving there and she was telling me how a friend of hers has 'DIABETIC' tattooed on his arm, so that if he passes out somewhere yada, yada, yada, bystanders know what's up. We then started joking that The Boy should (when he's older) get 'Peanut Allergy' tattooed on him. Then, it turned into that he should have Mr. Peanut tattooed on him with a big red 'X' through it. But then would that really relay to people that he has a peanut allergy? Or, that he just has a hatred for tiny mascots with monocles. Nevertheless, this sparked something in my weird, twisted noggin and I realized that I am beginning to resent this tiny nut. Not for the fact that he is a peanut, but for other, idiotic reasons; for example, he has a monocle, spats, and a cane. I find this odd that he goes to so much trouble to look like a gentleman, but then opts not to wear pants! Have you no decency Mr. Peanut? I think not. I do not approve of how this whimisical representation of a peanut glorifies the killer food. I mean, put a top hat on a rutabega and anyone will eat it. Mr. Peanut is sending a cruel message to our youth; that if it dances and lacks pants, it's ok...strippers rejoice everywhere!
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